It all began with a sports event located in Love's Park, Illinois. It was where I talked with men about personal and societal evolution toward love, overheard young women singing the Harry Potter theme, and where the clouds cleared to make way for a dome of sun, encased in a wall of peace. From our house you drive just over an hour in the direction of Chicago to get to Love's Park. In order to enter the sports complex hosting the event, you have to turn onto Sun Singer way. The first day of the tournament our entire family lounged on the outer edges of turf, and my husband sheltered me from from the rough winds and go-through-your-jacket cold of the early part of the day. By mid afternoon the gaze of the sun was lit with a calm hot blessing, like a steady stream of kisses for all in attendance. I had wanted to go home immediately when we arrived, but stuck it out because DH was so happy to be there, watching our daughter, taking in the milieu. Boy was I glad I did! Watching our daughter circle up with both her teammates and the opposing team in one circle after each match was medicine for my mama heart. Later I learned that they spent the time giving "spirit awards" and sharing what they appreciated about playing each other. My daughter relayed the types of compliments competitors gave each other: "I really enjoyed playing you because your cuts are really good and they caused me to up my game." "You bring great energy to the field." "I liked playing you because you challenged me to really pay attention to my defense." "Your intensity was awesome." The play was collaborative, as well as competitive, and I felt I was watching the future model of humanity take the reins on the field.

The day after the tournament my daughter shared that she kept receiving the message from her intuition that it would be good for us to check out cats at the Humane society. Our family nurtures our children's innate intuition the best we can, and besides, both my daughter and I had been feeling inclined to get a cat for the past few weeks. My husband had the day off, so 4 out of 5 Kwons were able to attend the cat expedition. I knew my oldest would be happy with any loving pet we brought home. She is picky about certain things - but in this one area, I knew she'd likely be head over heels glad about any nice animal. 

When we arrived at the Humane Society, the sun was clearly illuminating everything around us. Wild Turkeys meandered nearby. Once inside the building, I felt led to a certain pathway that led to a particular cat, who looked fearful, sad and vibrated an extremely pure love vibration. Her coat looked like liquid gold and white light had been turned into fur. Her name: Sunshine.

We decided to keep her adoption secret from the oldest to give her a good surprise. She'd had a doozy of a week with her academic workload and had been majorly stressing and feeling tired. Our middle child learned to keep a secret for the first time. And when brought Sunshine home the next day, she didn't even meow the whole entire car ride home. She saved that for the night time. But, just like a newborn, she delighted our hearts before she took away our sleep. It didn't take her too long to warm up to her surroundings. When our oldest came home, we told her to be quiet because we had a surprise for her and that we had brought someone home and they were under the bed. Her face went from downcast to pure delight just like a gentle, sure sunrise on the fabric of human skin, shining out from her eyes, smile and entire self.

Sunshine took a turn in everyone's lap who was home, and happily has taken to joining us for meals. She meows until we bring her plate over to circle up around us. Then she joyfully eats alongside us on the floor.

1. It felt like a relief. Although I checked messenger rather a lot the first day as I was awaiting replies on a couple of things, including a rather vulnerable sharing and coordinating a get together with a friend, by the second day, I no longer felt compelled to check, although I did once or twice out of habit. The knowing that I had given myself conscious and public permission to be on a facebook break meant instead feeling compelled to check notifications, I felt the happy joy forgoing it. I was surprised how GOOD it felt to not even wonder whether or not I *should* check. I didn't realize how much mental energy I had been losing. had a lot more focus in my work and my relationships were more fulfilling. I experienced more joy and felt more engaged with life. I created a lot more fabulous experiences.

2. I gave myself more time to fully savor my 3Dd interactions and I cherished the synchronicities even more than I usually do.

3. I had more time to process my emotions. I found myself having a bit of a mid life crisis, yet instead of avoiding it, I felt like I was able to embrace and be with what showed up. I started imagining my children leaving home and felt sad. I cried a little. I talked about it with them and it was very nurturing and healing. I also decided when they do leave home, I'll probably do more traveling so instead of feeling left behind, we all have stories we've lived and enjoy swapping when we get together.
By the end of the week I wasn't thinking much about the future at all. I was too busy being a kid at heart. I went to the playground and played like I've never played before TWICE with my youngest. We had a mock olympics that included a log hopping competition. We tied for the gold medal.

4. I realized just how much time I give away to trying make my voice heard to people who are probably already set in their ways. I kept looking at a piece of art I gave my husband that depicts an owl on a branch and says, "Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself." I concurrently found myself thinking about Buckminster Fuller's quote about creating a compelling alternate reality that is so attractive it makes the old one obsolete. Today I started thinking seriously about re-entry and whether or not I truly want to re-enter. If I am completely honest, I think the answer is a little yes and a lot no. Which leaves me thinking a highly reduced time on that interface might be good. But as a recovering addict, can I have just one glass of facebook? I've tried before and failed. Will this time be different? Can I really go in and get out and get off? Or is that naive, like Charles Wallace thinking he can go into the "IT" and come out again? Speaking of which, we saw A Wrinkle In Time. I loved the casting of the Murry family and Calvin; I had a really hard time coping with the casting the Mrs Ws. was unbearable. I missed Mrs. Beast, and the plot at the end gets screwed up and misses some important things. But even with all that, I still love the story. And the prologue in the beginning is rather stunning. The makeup of the Mrs Ws  is absolutely hideous. But to leave you on a high note, the special effects that turn Reese witherspoon into a vegetable woman resembling a hybrid between Swiss Chard and a brussel sprout head are exquisite, and it's fun to watch the flowers catch Calvin from his NDE falling off one of her leaves. And more significantly, I loved the way it was Meg's embrace of her own weaknesses that allowed her to be loved - and to love - unconditionally.